A Reason of the Hope that is in You

I Peter 3:15 tells us to “…sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear.” (emphasis mine)

One week ago today, just over half of the eligible voters made a decision that made most Americans either angry or ambivalent.  The 55% voter turnout in the 2016 presidential election is less than we’ve seen in twenty years (since Bill Clinton’s reelection against Dole). This tells me that many, like me, felt there could have been better options given. Unlike me, 45% of those dissatisfied with the process stayed home, wasting their voice and silencing their right to complain over the next four years.

Before you tell me there WERE better options given, let me remind you that we live in a two-party system, for better or for worse. Until a third-party candidate can overcome trending topics like who is having a gender identity crisis or who died on the most recent zombie show, America is not ready for, and really doesn’t deserve, a third party president. In order to elect a third party, we would need to work together with the same number of large, easily defined groups with which a majority of voters identify, in much the same way the other two major parties have done. If a third party candidate can get the Catholic church or the national labor unions to endorse him, he has a fighting chance. But 3% of the Kansas vote only takes those votes from the more likely candidates. It doesn’t necessarily even “send a message” to the establishment, unfortunately. I imagine few hate this fact as much as I do, but it’s true!

  

So, after holding our noses and voting, regardless of which candidate we chose to support, what’s a Christian to do when confronted with the real fear and despair facing our Democratic friends and family? Here are some of the quotes I’ve seen from women I love, and have a personal goal of ministering to:

I'm trying to stay positive. But all I can think is that more than half of Americans decided today that my precious, beautiful daughters are only valuable for the sexual gratification they provide to men. That's what this feels like.

The scariest reality. I don't want to tell my kids when they wake up. It's all so disgusting. Terrifying. Desperation, sinking into somewhere dark and cold.

One thing that is clear, is that we MUST NOT ignore them! Whether or not we understand these feelings, the truth is that many DO feel this way. In order to 'answer with meekness,' we must acknowledge the feelings they share with us. No, you and I did not publicly plunge into depression or ask for safe space after the elections of '92, '96, '08, or '12. But does that matter in 2016? Not really. Not to those who believe they are seeing the death of all that is important to them.

One of the basic ways President-Elect Trump won this election was by drawing a clear line between himself and the Democrat ideal. Where the Democrats welcome illegal immigrants, Trump would build a physical wall and deport many who are already here illegally. Where the Democrats push the LGBTQ agenda forward, Trump advocates his own description of family values (one which many, even in our camp, find deplorable). Even the poor, who have enjoyed unprecedented provision under the recent administration, see an opposite in Trump's plans to clean up the welfare system. And unfortunately, where the Democratic party has extended arms of perceived love and acceptance to many disabled and otherwise sidelined individuals, Trump repeatedly mocked and abused them. If you voted for Trump, you have a responsibility to answer those who fear for the disabled, the illegal immigrant, the poor, the homosexual, and for their own vulnerable daughters. 

Telling them everything will be OK is not enough.

So how can I possibly go on with life, knowing Trump will be our president in just 72 days?

First, let me be clear:

The election of Donald Trump as 

our 45th president is NOT the reason 

for the hope that is in me! 

If anything, this election reminds me once again that my God is in the heavens (Psalm 115:3) and has the power to put up kings and to tear down kingdoms (Daniel 2:21). If He is allowing America to continue to exist in the present moral climate, it is because He has a reason that will ultimately fulfill His plan for the universe. 

But here’s the major difference between myself and those expressing fear and even despair: my hope is not in ANY part of this world! 

Not in its institutions. 

Not in its leaders. 

Not in its churches. 

And certainly not in Washington! 

 My hope is in the Lord, who made heaven and earth (Psalm 121:2). Since He made them, He can certainly maintain them. A more accurate definition of the KJV “fear” is reverence. So a big part of my answer to the fear of my loved ones is my reverence for the true King of Kings. Because He is my King, I can’t even commiserate with the fear they are experiencing. I simply can’t feel a fear that deeply, because the fears I face come up against the Solid Rock of my knowledge that He is the blessed controller of ALL things (I Timothy 6:15). I think this is a big reason that Christians seem indifferent when interacting with the fearful in our community. When they accuse that we don’t get it, they’re right. But it is our responsibility to communicate the hope, without minimizing them as people.

In conclusion, we must start by ensuring that the position God holds in our lives really is that of Lord and King. If we see Him as the highest power in ourselves, we can accept Him as the highest power in the world around us. But, we must also face the fears of those around us with both meekness (acknowledging their pain, and that Trump and Clinton neither one are the answer) and fear, or reverence (sharing the name and character of our Lord as an answer to their fears). 

I think this quote, from another friend, sums up what our friends need from us. [My notes are in red.] While the hands and feet of our responses may differ from hers, she asks only what is our biblical responsibility. Pray about it. It's what Christ would do for "the least of these" (Matthew 25:40).

I need all of you who voted for this administration to be prepared to fight for what you say you believe. You say that you want a greater America. Well, any basic civics lesson will tell you that America is only as great as the way it treats its most vulnerable citizens. Get ready. You've exercised your right. Now exercise your duty.

When the disabled are mocked, you must be the first to rise in protest and cry foul.

When immigrants are scorned, you must be the first to defend their humanity. [Am I maintaining their dignity, even as I demand they enter legally?]

When women are raped, you must be the first to step forward to protect them. [Remember, protecting a woman would be the opposite of offering her a major operation, such as an abortion.]

When the poor are denied access to health care, you must show up and care for them yourselves. [Is my own church doing enough to care for those who fall through the cracks in the secular system, without judging them for how they got there?]

When the LGBT kids are bullied, you must show up to wrap your arms around them and love them back to life. [We MUST do this, but do it without approving their lifestyle or their demands for special/equal rights.]

If you voted for this administration, I'm talking to YOU. This is your sworn duty now. Take it seriously. Show us you weren't just lying when you said you want us to be a great country.

Show us you have the ability to love as ferociously as you have shown you can scream insults and threaten to imprison people. I have to believe you have the capacity to do both. Prove it.

That's what I need.

Book Review: The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

One rainy afternoon, while riding a city bus, Gretchen Rubin asked herself, “What do I want from life, anyway?” She answered, “I want to be happy”—yet she spent no time thinking about her happiness. In a flash, she decided to dedicate a year to a happiness project. The result? One of the most thoughtful and engaging works on happiness to have emerged from the recent explosion of interest in the subject.

One of the things that most resonates with me from this study is the similarity between the author and myself of expecting “gold stars” for accomplishments. Rubin showed repeatedly throughout her year-long experiment how this predisposition to expect praise and gratitude from those she interacted with negatively impacted her happiness. I find the same to be true in my own life. If I expect someone to notice what I’ve done (whether for him or for life in general), it is because I am keeping score in a way. If I take out the trash and expect someone to notice, it is often because I subconsciously view it as “not my job” and by definition, as his or her job.

The way Rubin accomplished many of her more onerous micro-goals within the larger project was to “Act the way you want to feel.” When she didn’t feel like singing in the morning, she made up a silly song about not feeling like it. I've given this counsel to my older kids (step-kids) for many years, and am now building it into the lives of my younger children, as well. Far from creating little hypocrites, a practice like this teaches ourselves and our children the importance of choosing their behavior, and thereby choosing their attitude. If we allow our emotions to dictate our actions, we never grow beyond the childish level of tantrums (think of an over-tired or hungry toddler). But as adults, we often must force our actions to dictate our emotions (getting up to help a sick loved one in the middle of the night or when we ourselves are ill). What better time to instill this life skill than in childhood?

Another concept from the book is one I've been taught by my own wise parents. "Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good." My dad, our yearbook coach in high school, used to say, "It will never be perfect, but it WILL be the deadline." In other words, don't let the pursuit of perfection either derail you from finishing a job, or from beginning it at all. If you can’t change or perfect everything all at once, work to change SOMETHING right away, and improve more later.

Rubin builds a fabulous project to enhance her happiness, with the goal of improving her relationships with others, during an intensive one-year undertaking. She uses thorough research, micro-accountability, and specific goals to measure her progress, and by doing so, challenged me to think more deeply about my own choices regarding happiness. Although not a Christian book, the Happiness Project correlates well with Scriptural themes of choosing joy regardless of our circumstances, and deciding to be content in whatever state we find ourselves. She uses the concept of considering one another in her First Splendid Truth: One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make others happy. That one will preach!

There's much more to love in The Happiness Project. Take the time to read it with a notepad beside you, so you can benefit from your own intensive study of happiness.