It will never be perfect...

I made my goal of 100,000 pages and over 365 books!

My dad used to tell us (especially in Yearbook class, which he taught) "It will never be perfect, but it WILL be the deadline."

Well, the deadline for this post has come and gone about 60 days ago. I had begun to write it in late December, but kept telling myself I could improve it. And here we are, in early March, with a less-than-perfect review of my Year in Reading for 2015. So, I'm here to tell you that it is NOT perfect, but it is WAY PAST the deadline. Enjoy! Hope it's an encouragement to you. (I don't expect that most people could read nearly this much, if they were actually accomplishing anything else in their lives. But this is the life God gave me in 2015, and I tried to use it to His glory as I read.)

My year in books

This year started out as any other, except that I was fully recovered from a broken foot that took up 11 months of 2014, so I was ready to get back into “normal life.” Much to my surprise, God had other plans. J On January 6, I woke up so dizzy I couldn’t sit without assistance. While not every day has been like that, every single day in 2015 has involved migraines and/or debilitating dizziness to some extent. I haven’t been able to drive or go out of the house much, except for multitudes of medical appointments. But I have been able to read most days! Praise the Lord for that! On days that I couldn’t read, I listened to audio books, and on days I couldn’t even do that, I prayed… probably for some of you who are reading this! Thank you for your prayers and loving support of my family throughout this year. As I learn a new normal in dealing with this (permanent?) condition, I am reminded of my place in the body of Christ, and I am so grateful for those who continue to uphold us, both physically and spiritually. Here are the books God brought across my path this year.

Biography/Autobiography (38)

This was the most encouraging category I read in during 2015. In no particular order, my favorites were:  Unbroken, the story of Louis Zamperini, was fascinating, and much better than the movie, in my opinion. There was some language, but it was not gratuitous. We encouraged our teenaged son to read it. Evidence Not Seen, by Darlene Deibler Rose, recounted the journey she and her husband took as young adults to become missionaries in the south Pacific. Their island work was halted and they were imprisoned by the Japanese during WWII, and her testimony of faith and seeing God work in that inhuman place was refreshing to my daughters and me as we listened to the audio version in our homeschool time. The Last of the Doughboys by Richard Rubin is a collection of interviews with the last living World War I soldiers as of about the year 2000. I was amazed to see how each of them had lived an entire lifetime beyond their military service, which was from such a different era. I Dared to Call Him Father by Biquis Sheikh (set in mid-20^th century Middle East) and Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus by Nabeel Qureshi (set in 9/11 era United States) each dealt with a Muslim’s passage from devout worship of Allah to a miraculous New-Testament-style faith in the One True God. I encourage you to read these books and have your own faith challenged!

Classic Fiction (10)

For want of a better title, this category covers everything from Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockinbird and Go Set a Watchman to Victor Hugo’s Les Miserables. I saw these books as the yummy veggies on my reading plate. They’re definitely not “dessert” like other fiction, but they don’t require quite as much discipline as devotionals and some non-fiction work. Les Miserables was the most challenging for me to accomplish this year, partly because I found it at a time when I was feeling stronger physically, and actually didn’t HAVE to lie around reading 12-15 hours a day. I had to force myself to stick with the first 25%, but then I began to enjoy the story more. Hugo really does have a serious problem with rabbit trails, which he hammers on until they are modern paved highways of multiple chapter diversions! Ugh! This category also included Herman Melville’s Moby Dick and Billy Budd, which were not my favorites. I found it difficult to follow characters and almost impossible to figure out why he chose to include some of the more arcane details. My favorites included Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo and My Antonia by Willa Cather.

Middle School Fiction (49)

My favorites in this category are definitely the “I Survived” series by Lauren Tarshis. My daughter found these at the library, and both she and I have devoured every one we could find. She even convinced her grandma to gift one to each grandkid this Christmas, so they can trade around after they finish one! The books are historically accurate with fascinating detail and captivating characters. Even in the worst tragedies, the author is cautious about which characters die, making these ideal for the 4^th-7^th grade set.  Another series I enjoyed this year is Flavia de Luce, by Alan Bradley. I was disappointed by the use of vulgar language, and especially by the focus on the occult in one of the later books, but as an adult, I enjoyed the other books. Unfortunately, I chose not to share them with my middle-school girls because of the language. Perhaps the best book in this category was Tiger Rising by Kate DiCamillo. (See how I put the same author in two categories? Proves I don't have a clue! These categories are very...ahem....fluid!) Her fiction is didactic, but without hitting the reader over the head. Her characters are well-developed and face real problems in relatable ways. Her writing spans many different age groups, but I haven’t found a bad one yet.

Tried to Read, but Hated (3)

It is rare for me NOT to finish a book. I consider it to be a challenge for me to overcome my ‘druthers’ and power through, even when it is no longer enjoyable (see Billy Budd and Les Miserables). However, these books go down in history for being so distasteful that I QUIT! L Gasp! The Claim by Kevin Borgan uses angels and demons impersonating characters to create a lousy rendition of Christian fiction. This is not Frank Peretti, folks, it is a confusing mish-mash of powers that Scripture says we should not use for entertainment. Blue Hole Back Home by Joy Jordan-Lake was just plain stupid. The characters were unclear, and the author assigned them feelings and mindsets that were not well-developed, in my opinion. Don’t waste your time. Finally, Truth Seekers, by Anne-Rae Vasquez, is the first book in a trilogy that I really wanted to enjoy. The write-up on Amazon seemed like something that could pique my interest, but again… the characters were confusing, and the author assumed too much about my understanding of their perspectives and their goals. I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t.

Devotional/Christian/Self-Help (20)

The other enjoyable, but still meaty, category that I read this year involved a variety of books designed for 31-day studies, etc. Perhaps the most meaningful book, which I’m still working on for my 2016 list, is Amma, a book about the writings and life of Amy Carmichael. I plan to find more books by Carmichael in 2016, in large part because she spent the final 20 years of her life in debilitating illness. Her ministry continues today not because she was a great missionary, but because God tested her physically in a great way. I also read The Friendships of Women by Dee Brestin, which was kind of disheartening, because I read it at a time when I was feeling very down about missing church for months on end without hearing from most of the women I would have considered to be friends. 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Wife by Arlene Pellicane, Plenty: 31 Sips of Joy for Moms Everywhere by Kari Patterson, and 31 Days of Prayer for my Teen by Susan Alexander Yates both served as great one-month challenges for me. One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and Welcome to the Funny Farm by Karen Scalf Linamen were awesome reads, in that they were enjoyable and light-weight right up until the point they stepped all over my toes. I found myself both challenged and encouraged spiritually.

If you are looking for free or inexpensive e-books, I encourage you to subscribe to these sites: Christianbookfinds.com (both on FB and on the web), and Bookbub.com (via email). Both sites list e-books that are available at a discount each day. I download the free ones that interest me and keep them in a queue for when I am looking for something to read. J

Besides these two sites, I get most of my books from my local library, or on my favorite app, Overdrive. Overdrive allows you to sign into any library for which you hold a card (even if you are not local to that library) and borrow e-books and audio-books through that library for a set amount of time.

As I said, this post is incomplete, and for that, I apologize. I wish I could tell you more about every category I read. But I pray you will look up some of these books for your own edification. Tell me what you think of them! :-)

Leap Day 2016!

Leapin' Lizards! (Yes, we watched the original Annie over the weekend, and laughed at that line.) It's February 29 again. :-)

I don't know what sort of ideas you have for commemorating the day. I've heard several suggestions, from playing leap frog to hosting a frog-themed play date. Those didn't sound like ones my kids would like, so instead, we created a time capsule, to be opened on February 29, 2020. The assumption at this point is that we'll still be living in this house so we'll probably "hide" it outside somewhere, such as in the landscaping, instead of truly burying it. I'm using an old plastic jar from my Geocaching stash, and I plan to hot glue or super glue it closed to keep out the moisture. I chose the plastic jar because that's what I've used for geocaches in the past, and they seem to last in the wilds of Missouri. :-)

Here are the questions I asked my kids (ages 17, 10, and 8), and had them answer in their own handwriting:

Who are your closest friends?

Who are your teachers at EH?   

What do you do in free time?  

What’s the last good book you read?  

What are you doing in BAFA this year?  

Who do you think will win the election this year?  

What do you think you’ll be doing in 4 years, that’s different from today? 

We'll put these documents, along with the page I created telling a bit about where our family is, and what some common consumer goods cost us, in the jar before burying it.

We pay:                 $2.41 for a gallon of 2% milk at Aldi

                                $4.89 for 10 lbs of sugar at Sam’s

                                $1.49 for 3 lbs of Gala apples at Aldi

                                $4.98 for 2 lbs of Sharp Cheddar cheese at Sam’s

                                $1.54 for a gallon of low-grade gas at QuikTrip

We do most of our shopping at Aldi, Sam’s, Walmart, and on Amazon.com (Prime).

Daniel & Justine live in Findlay, OH, and are fostering kids, hoping to adopt soon.

Amanda & Marc live in San Antonio, Texas, with Gabriel (age 3) and Michael (age 1).

David & Dawna live in Groves, Texas with Drew (age 1) and Hayden (age 2 months).

Audrey & Carlos live in Lancaster, CA, except when he’s traveling for his bball teams in El Salvador and Panama.

Theron & Sam are in college at Pensacola, Florida. Theron works at FedEx.

What else do you suggest we put in our time capsule? I thought about taking some pictures of the inside of our home, since we plan to do a lot of "fixing up" once we get it paid off later this year. Thoughts?

However you choose to celebrate Leap Day, make sure you're using it to further the kingdom of God!

Blessings,
Rachel

My anchor holds

In Times Like These
(Ruth Caye Jones - Mother Jones)

In times like these, we need a Savior
In times like these, we need an anchor
Be very sure, be very sure
Your anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock

This Rock is Jesus, Yes, He's the one
This Rock is Jesus, The only One
Be very sure, be very sure
Your anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock

In times like these, oh be not idle
In times like these we need the Bible
Be very sure, be very sure
Your anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock

That Rock is Jesus, Yes, He's the one
That Rock is Jesus, The only One
Be very sure, be very sure
Your anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock

In times like these, I have a Savior
In times like these, I have an anchor
I'm very sure, I'm very sure
My anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock

That Rock is Jesus, Yes, He's the one
That Rock is Jesus, The only One
Be very sure, be very sure
Your anchor holds and grips the Solid Rock.

Sometimes, it seems God has left us adrift. It can seem as though He is allowing us to be cast aside, perhaps through illness. While our 'Christian brains' know better, our childish hearts ache for the comfort of normal routines. [Funny, isn't it, how "normal" life leaves us pseudo-complaining about the rush of our lives, but as soon as we are side-lined, we find ourselves clawing our way back to that "Normal" we miss so much. :-) ]

Sometimes, God adjusts our plans, and we aren't able to determine the reason. When I heard this hymn on a live stream recently, I was reminded of one reason God might allow us to be sidelined, sometimes temporarily, and sometimes permanently.

Throughout history, we have sought the reason for problems in a Christian's life. Job's friends wondered what he had done to deserve his trials, and in the first-century, even Jesus was asked whether the parents' sin had caused the child's problems. Not much has changed. In the twenty-first century, I find myself constantly asking the Lord whether there is something I could learn, accomplish, or repent of in order to change my present circumstances. But then, I am reminded, in such a loving and sweet refrain, that My Rock is Jesus.

These words were originally written as a slave song. Can you imagine the trials they faced? So much worse than my little-bitty problems! If they could sing of their dependence on the Savior and the Bible, then I, too, can rest on His strength.

The truth is as obvious now as when the phrases were first penned: All I need is the Savior, and He is the one my anchor holds to.

More thoughts from "Amma: the Life and Words of Amy Carmichael"

Last week, I introduced a book about Amy Carmichael. As I neared the end of the book, I found another segment I'd like to share with you. Usually, the parts of a book that stand out to me are things I can relate to immediately. While I've been in this position before, I'm not currently in the position of feeling criticized by others around me. So I can only assume that God is prompting me to share this for the sake of one of my readers. Please pass it on, if you feel it can bless someone else.

"There was a day" writes Carmichael, "when Walker (a leader in their ministry) sat alone in his study reading the copy of a document addressed to the Archbishop of Canterbury. It was a petition against him and one or two other true men who had stood by him in his efforts to cut certain cankers out of this South Indian Church. It was an amazing composition, cruel and false because [it was] so ignorant. He came out from his study that day looking very white, and his eyes were like dark fires. But he went straight on like a man walking through cobwebs stretched across his path. And what does it matter now? He has seen his Lord's face. All that troubles is only for a moment. Nothing is important but that which is eternal."

The phrase Carmichael uses here, "What does it matter now? He has seen his Lord's face" struck me when I read it. As I said, for those suffering unfair accusations, perhaps this will be an encouragement. Even in my own current situation, I can readily accept the wisdom of this phrase. What does it matter that she was incapacitated for xx years? What does it matter that she couldn't attend such or such an event because of illness? She has seen her Lord's face.

My prayer is first of all that, in this world, those around me will be able to see this truth in my life. I pray that my children, my loved ones, and even my sisters and brothers in Christ, will be able to say, "What does that illness matter? It is drawing her closer to Christ, so blessing has come from her illness."

More importantly, though, I long to leave a legacy beyond my own fragile years on this earth. A hundred years from now, anyone who reads my journal should be able to say, "What does it matter that God took her through this trial or that hardship? She has seen her Lord's face." The most important thing I can show as a result of whatever I face on a given day, whether illness or health, whether poverty or riches, whether discouragement or pleasure, is that God's glory trumps all else. Those trials were but a drop in the larger bucket of His care for me.

Grandkid Visits - part Two

I think I owe you a few more pictures from our recent visits with the grandkids (and their precious parents, of course). Here ya go!

From Pensacola, we spent our 13th anniversary, January 2, driving west toward Groves, Texas. We drove through some very impoverished areas, and were reminded of the many material things we have to be grateful for. We also found a shack-type restaurant that served crawdads by the pound. We were the only non-locals in there, from what we could tell! We courageously made our way through shrimp etouffee, boudin balls, red beans and rice, and numerous other Louisiana specialties. Then Dan rewarded the girls with ice cream later after we arrived at the hotel. :-)

The next morning, Sunday, Dan and the girls went to church with our son David & his wife Dawna. They also got to meet Hayden, our newest grand-baby, for the first time. A migraine kept me at the hotel for a few extra hours, but I was able to join them for the afternoon and evening church. This guy and his older brother, Drew, are absolutely precious, happy babies. We thoroughly enjoyed our time with them, even though we got less than 48 hours together. We're looking forward to a longer visit in May when they come for Malachi's graduation.

We opened Christmas presents together. Is there anything cuter than a toddler ripping off gift wrap?

When Drew was born, Dan and I made him a recordable book of our voices reading a story to him. He "read" it with me during one of his rare quieter moments. :-)

Aunt Essie and Aunt Esther love their nephews! They are so sweet and careful with the babies, 

and so creative and playful with the older ones. God planned our family perfectly!

After not nearly enough time with these four, we headed further west to San Antonio to see our other Texas kids. On the way, we stopped at another authentic eatery, a Mexican place in downtown Houston. Again, we were the only non-Spanish speakers in the place, and felt like we had a very authentic experience! We enjoyed the next two days with our daughter, Amanda, her husband, Marc, and their boys, Gabriel (age 3) and Michael (age 16 months). We hadn't seen Michael since he was a newborn, so we thoroughly enjoyed getting to know his little toddler self! 

The girls did a lot of wrestling, and jumping, and running... what else do you do with two boys?

We got to babysit the boys one morning while their mom was out! We had a blast!

Three of our daughters, and Amanda's two boys, at the San Antonio Aquarium

This poor turtle was a very good sport around lots of little, inquisitive people.

Nona Rachel had fun building towers for Gabe and Michael to knock down. :-)

Would you trust these doctors?

We had to leave Amanda's house all too soon, since Dan had to be back at work over the weekend. :-( They, too, will be in KC in May, Lord willing, so we'll look forward to more time then! We made a quick visit to the Alamo, then headed north with full hearts and lots of memories!

The highlight of our drive north was stopping in to see the Booths and McAnarneys, 

friends who used to attend our church here in KC, and are now based out of Fort Hood, 

just south of Dallas. And yes, I got to hold another little baby boy during our visit! 

I'm a sucker for baby boys, when my grandboys are so far away!

That was the end of our eleven day, nineteen hundred mile journey. I'm so grateful for: 1) a hubby who is willing to make the financial commitment to visit our kiddos, 2) kiddos who are willing to make us a part of their lives, 3) a job that allows Dan the time off for long trips like this, 4) kids who travel well, even when bouncing around for nearly two weeks, doing homeschool in the car!, and so many other things!

Thanks for traveling with us via these pics. I promise, I won't bore you with any more grandbabies for a bit. :-)

Thoughts on "Amma: the Life and Words of Amy Carmichael

Today I want to share with you a book I've been reading. Amma: The Life and Words of Amy Carmichael by Elizabeth Skoglund is a compilation of excerpts from Carmichael's writings accompanied by Skoglund's commentary. This book has been an encouragement to me over the last few months as I've worked my way through it at the recommendation of a friend.

The first thing that struck me about this book is a point from Amy Carmichael's life. Her work as a missionary was extensive, but the truth is that we probably never would have heard of her if she had been able to live out her life in India in the way she had planned. It was her injury, as the result of an unexpected fall, at the age of 64, in 1931 that brought her ministry to the masses. Carmichael spent the final 20 years of her life as an invalid, but those years of enforced rest were used by God to expand her ministry, when she might have expected it to be limited. It was during those years that she wrote extensively, and it is these thoughts, born of physical disappointment and intense pain, that have been such an encouragement to me.

There is so much good stuff in this book. I would encourage you to read it next time God gives you a time of enforced rest, whether physical or otherwise. Years after her injury, Amy Carmichael wrote the following, about the event that ended her physically active ministry.

"You had hoped to burn out, not rust out. You had expected (if the Lord tarried) the natural end of the fighting man. ...This, and this, and this you will never do again. And the road will grow duller and darker with every mile you go -- is that your thought?" 

A Voice speaks within you: "Things will never be as they were before? That is true: for they will be better. You will never do this and this again? That also is true; for I have other things for you to do. They are not what you would choose? But they are indeed the best that Love can choose for you to do..."

"And Yet -- O Lord, forgive; the things I cannot do are looking in through my window now, and beckoning to me, and calling me."

"But I am here in the room with you: I am nearer than these beckoning, calling things. I come between them and you. You have nothing to do now, but to please Me." 

Oh, how I understand the beckoning of things that I wish I could do. And they are good things! I want to be able to take my girls out of the house for ministries to the neighbors, or to engage with nature and worship the Creator, or to minister to other hurting members of our church body, or even simply to attend church with my family! For much of the last year, I heard the Father saying, "No. That is not your calling right now. Your calling is to make much of the time you have within your home, and many times, in your own bed. What can you do for My kingdom from your new place?" He has always been faithful to remind me of ways I could minister, sometimes in prayer, in letter writing, in challenging my children spiritually, and in so many other ways. Truly, as long as we have breath, we have His calling on our lives, and it is to please Him who gives us that breath.

What books have been an encouragement to you recently? Do you have a recommendation for me?

Memories and Gratitude from Christmas and New Years

Thankful in 2016

We had a wonderful visit with Sam over Christmas. For now, he is our only college kid who still lives at home for his breaks. Theron, also in college, works full-time for FedEx in Pensacola, so he can't make it home for Christmas anymore :-( Sam gave his dad and me each "PCC parent" shirts. For those who have followed my journey as a step-mom, you'll know what an answer to prayer it is that my son can give a gift to his "mom" as if it is no big deal. Praise the Lord for healing that relationship!

We also had the incredible privilege of hosting our niece and nephew, whose family are missionaries in Bolivia, over the Christmas holiday. Trevor, a senior at USC in California, had fun teaching Esther some new skills on her ukelele. Tasha, a sophomore at Grace Bible College in Grand Rapids, received a puzzle from one of the kids, and had fun putting it together with her cousins. We made lots of memories, and enjoyed many hours of sitting around, talking, reading, playing board games, and ridding the Robart house of every last chocolate chip! Great times... we look forward to hosting them, and maybe their brother, too, in the future! :-)

The day after Christmas, we were surprised by the arrival of Daniel (our oldest) and his wife, Justine, visiting from Ohio! It was so great to see them and get some hugs. They're in the process of adopting through the fostering system, so we didn't expect to get a visit from them until May, if then! The kids enjoyed playing board games with their brother and sister-in-law, and making lots of memories together.

When we finally hit the road for our long-awaited trip, we were already filled with happy memories and all the yummy Christmas treats we had enjoyed together. Our first stop was Pensacola, where we enjoyed some fellowship with the Grays, former members of EH and good friends from KC.

We also spent a few days with Theron, who hadn't made it home for Christmas due to his work with FedEx in Pensacola. He is so great with his sisters, and they enjoyed the time with him immensely. He even taught us a new board game! (Don't ask!) :-) Being the horrible mother that I am, I convinced Dan to find us a beach where we could put our toes in the Gulf of Mexico. Of course, it was 38 degrees, and the winds were incredible! But that's how you make memories, right?! Of course right! :-)

We left Pensacola on our 13th wedding anniversary, headed west toward Texas to meet a new grandson and visit a couple more kids. That will have to wait for another post, though, because you'd better believe there will be LOTS of pics of these sweet grandboys! :-) What are you thankful for as you look back over the last couple weeks?

Rachel